Narcissa & Lucius The First Year
by Sweet Darkling
Summary: A dialogue-only Narcissa and Lucius fic - taking place in Draco's first year. It's humourous and out of character, taking place the day Draco leaves for Hogwarts. It's in the same style as Lucius and the Hairstyle, for those of you who have read it. R


The Death Eaters Annual September Soirée

"He's _gone_ Cissy!"

"I know, Lucy dear."

"But he's _really _gone, Cissy!"

"Yes, I _know_, Lucy dear."

"But _Draco's_ actually _gone_, Cissy!"

"Gosh, really? I had no idea! Dear."

"What?"

"Oh for the love of all that is evil, stop _crying_ Lucy dear."

"I am NOT crying!"

"And don't get into a huff with me! Dear."

"I am _not_ in a huff!"

"Yes you are, dear."

"No, I am NOT!"

"See? Dear."

"Hmph!"

"You shouldn't sulk, Lucy dear. It is terribly immature of you."

"I am _not _sulking, Narcissa!"

"See? You are, dear."

"No I am NOT!"

"Do not stamp your feet when you are sulking, Lucy dear."

"I am not _SULKING_!"

"You called me Narcissa. So of course you're sulking. Dear. Now do wipe your tears, and have a cup of tea to calm yourself down, dear."

"Those are not tears!"

"Well, we apparated into Kings Cross, so it can't be rain, dear."

"I am not talking to you."

"Not even if I give you some of my _special_ cookies with your tea, dear?"

"I am not a child, Cissy, so stop treating me like one, by trying to _bribe _me with cookies!"

"Then do stop acting like a child, dear. Even Draco darling did not cry when he got onto the train. And it was his first time going to Hogwarts too!"

"Well, it was our first time for allowing him to go to Hogwarts too, you know! And don't roll your eyes at me, Cissy!"

"Well, don't be so silly, dear. If Draco wasn't crying, neither should you, dear."

"But _Cissy_-"

"And do stop whining, Lucy dear. Come now, Draco seemed to have met some of his friends already, before he got onto the train. So I am sure there is nothing to worry about there."

"Some _friends_, Cissy? Are you mad? There was that crazy girl who started insulting him the minute she saw Draco!"

"_I_ insulted _you_ too, when I first met you, you know, dear."

"What do you mean, when you _first _met me?! You have continued to insult me to this very day!"

"Well, but dear-"

"You called me immature just a few minutes ago, Cissy."

"Oh, but you _were_ dear!"

"Well, Narcissa, I am surprised you ever chose to marry me. And I wonder that you do not divorce me to marry someone else!"

"Oh, but _dear_, it is the very reason why I chose to marry you! I love insulting you! And _you_ are one of the _very _few men who are manly enough to withstand it, dear. And you _know_ how irresistible I find such _manly_ men..."

"Ooh, Cissy, at this time of day?"

"At this time of day what, dear?"

"Well...Cissy...weren't you suggesting...?"

"Suggesting _what_, dear?"

"Er...well, anyway, who _was _that annoying, crazy girl that began insulting Draco?"

"Oh, that was Pansy Parkinson. Daughter of Gen Parkinson. One of my very good friends."

"Oh...? Oh! The one with the creamy skin and the black hair?"

"_Creamy_ skin?!"

"Er...or so I've heard it described. She doesn't come to mind easily. At all. Visually, I mean. So I just recall her...well, I remember her as people describe her. So I recall her description, from what people tell me."

"Indeed?!"

"Er...um...Cissy...?"

"..."

"...Well, anyway, Cissy. Tell me about this Parkinson girl. She seems very annoying and irritating and childish."

"Oh...well, she will be in the same year as Draco, she will hopefully be in Slytherin-"

"_Hopefully_?! You don't think...Draco wouldn't...he _couldn't_...Cissy, he _will_ be in Slytherin...?"

"Oh, of _course_ he will be in Slytherin. Which other house could he be in, dear?"

"Oh...yes...yes...yes, of course. He _will_ be in Slytherin. Oh, I believe Crabbe's son and Goyle's son will be in the same year as Draco, too. So he already has some friends with him, which is comforting to know."

"You forgot Pansy, dear."

"Pansy? Pansy whom?"

"Pansy Parkinson, dear – the girl you dislike. Draco is already familiar with her, dear."

"Oh, _her_? Well, I would NOT call her a friend. I would rather call her a bully!"

"Do not snort, dear. It is _terribly_ inelegant. And a _bully_? I don't think she is a bully, dear."

"How can you say that, when you saw how she insulted him?"

"_I_ think she might like him – maybe even _like him_ like him. She is young enough to show it like that, don't you think, dear?"

"Hmph. Wait...you think she _fancies _him? But she is so _rude_! And she has such a short nose!"

"I think she is quite adorable, dear."

"She is rude and mean and she bullies Draco and I will _NEVER_ allow her to marry Draco!"

"_Marry_ Draco? Lucy dear, they're only eleven! I don't think that she's thinking of _marrying_ Draco...yet. I think she only likes him. Maybe more than platonically. And they will make such a _cute_ couple, dear."

"I can't believe you just giggled, Cissy. You know...it's rather..._sexy_ when you giggle like that. And when you blush like _that_. ... You know Cissy...now that Draco is gone...the house is empty..."

"Oh yes; completely empty – except for the dozens of house-elves!"

"You never used to mind it _before_..."

"But Lucy, we have to get ready for the Death Eaters Annual September Soiree..."

"We still have five hours to get ready..."

"Are you sure that will be enough time?"

"You look _delicious _right now, Cissy..."

"But you want me to curl your hair as well..."

"We can always arrive fashionably late..."

"I guess this is one good thing that comes from Draco going to Hogwarts..."

"... ... ...Oh _how_ can you say that so _heartlessly_, Cissy?! Our only son – miles and miles and miles away – with nobody to look after him – and no-one to protect him from bullies. My poor little lonely son!"

"And those mean little girls that will beat him up too – who will protect Draco from them, dear?!"

"You will be sorry, Cissy, that you ever made such a joke; when Draco is covered in boils, or dances around because of a jinx, or has been cursed into oblivion – because of evil, vicious, crazy little girls like that Parkinson chit, you will regret ever joking about it!"

"Oh don't pout dear. Ok, I'll make it up to you. How about I...not only _curl_ your hair, but I will set it in a very elegant, very _dashing_ bun, for the Soirée, dear..."

"Oh, Cissy! That will be wonderful! Of course I forgive you anything, my heart's treasure, when you make my hair look so _pretty_ and eye-grabbing! Now, let's hurry, dear. We only have a little more than four hours to get ready now ...we'll have to rush..."

_Fini _

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters involved in this fic, except for Gen Parkinson, the mother of Pansy Parkinson. I am not making any money out of this.

_**Author's Note**__: I really enjoyed writing this, but it was hard work making it clear who was talking when. I don't think it's up to the standard of Lucius and the Hairstyle, but I feel that that was easier. It was shorter, and because it takes place once Draco's at Hogwarts, it's easy to make the chatter between Narcissa and Lucius a bit more interesting. So I'm sorry if people are disappointed with this one, in comparison to the other fic. Also, I apologise in advance for my over-dose of 'dear's from Narcissa...but I love to picture her as the kind of woman who would automatically add it, when talking to her husband. I also admit freely that the characters are vastly out of character – but this is done intentionally to make it humourous. I also want to say that this is definitely the first in a series of 12 – one for each month. The next one will be coming eventually, once I've written the next chapter for my Cowboy Bebop fic – Sometimes it's enough. Please read that, if you have time (even if you haven't watched the animé). Anyway, please read and review. I always love to hear from any poor soul who manages to read any of my writings entirely. Much love to you guys,_

_Trina_


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